Anecdotes #1

A collection of anecdotes before I retire:

My Sixes

One time I threatened to tattle-tale on my friend Clint for doing something bad in class. To prove my threat was serious I walked up to the teacher, but I knew it was bad to tattle-tale so when she asked me what I wanted I said, “Can I pass off my sixes?” (As in the multiplication table of sixes.)

Scary Principal

In Cub Scouts you earn activity badges. One of the badges was for academics, and to complete it you had to have an interview with the principal of your school. I was dead afraid of that, because all I knew of principals was what I heard on TV and that they were the enemy. Ultimately my mom had to escort me there, and as it turned out, he was really nice. He even had a collection of McDonald’s toys, and I myself had a similar collection!

Soap Suds

Growing up with a single mom meant that I had to get babysat. So babysitters had to come up with activities for the kids they took care of. One of our baby sisters had the activity of “soap suds”! Many kids got excited for “soap suds” but I realized that “soap suds” always came after playing with play dough on the table, and all we were really doing was cleaning the table with soap and that was a chore and I did not like chores.

Cat Food is Good

When I was a kid it was popular to eat cat food and dog food. I liked cat food the best. My brother liked dog food the best. To this day I like cats better than dogs. Go figure.


One time at cub scout camp the popular thing to buy from the “trading post” was a water pistol. So I wanted to get one too. Everyone buying them was calling them “squirts” instead of water pistols. I’d never heard a water pistol called a “squirt” before, but I guessed that’s what they were called, so I said to the guy behind the counter “I want a squirt”, and he sold me a water pistol for a dollar.